Autopictography II

Inspiration for my 25th year on Planet Earth

i want to live like this.

"...to speak French fluently and play Moonlight Sonata perfectly."

yea, man.
its always nice to be reminded.

"Im a wretch; but I love love"-Jack Kerouac

ive never read something so moving in my life, may the world try to live by these words.

i love blanca cunningham.

!

a classic favorite.

oh if only....

truer words have never been written.

AMEN!

To My Little Lisa

I'm not really sure what love is, but I think it goes something like this:

“ If you pick me a flower, I’ll wear it in my hair. I’ll stash little notes for you where you least expect them. I don’t have many firsts left, but I’d like someone who I could offer all of my lasts. We’ll make history together. I’ll wait for you even if you’re late - and I won’t complain about it. Promise. Kindness to cashiers, valets, waiters and maddeningly slow postal clerks who would try the patience of Gandhi is a must. I will feel safe and most at peace in your arms. When you’re counting aloud, I’ll try and mess you up. I’ll find you magically delicious. I’ll let you be right when it doesn’t really matter. I’ll giggle when you show off and I know it’s just for me. I’ll hold your coffee while you drive. I can build a fire without burning the house down. If you wash the car with me - I promise to wear a white t-shirt for you. I‘ll hide around corners and try to scare you in the middle of the night. Of course, I’ll end up scaring myself and you’ll have to calm me down. I can change a flat tire and my own oil. It’s the simple things you do that make me swoon the most. I love it when you sing to me. I’ll make you mickey mouse pancakes. Sleeping in has a whole new meaning when we’re doing it together. I’ll cover you up and kiss your forehead when you fall asleep watching TV. I won’t swear around your family or make you wear silly sweaters at my family’s at Christmas. I’ll grant you three wishes. I’ll give you the last bite. I’ll make you laugh. I’ll stare in wonder with you at that hot chick with the great rack. I will marvel at your strength. I’ll take care of you when you’re sick. I give a kick ass massage. I think it’s hot when you come home all dirty from playing or working hard. My heart will skip a beat every time you walk through the door. My kisses will take your breath away - seriously. I’ll giggle if you leave your socks on in bed. My quirks and oddities have been deemed ‘adorable’ by some and I will love you more everyday for all of yours. I will hold you when you need it. I’ll give you space when you need it. I will let you be you. You’ll sleep better when I’m next to you. I’ll sleep better when I’m next to you. I’ll thank you every time you open a door for me. I’ll never give you shit in front of your friends. I won’t ever let you leave for work in the morning without your lunch and a passionate kiss. We can watch your movie first. I’ll clean the house perfectly before every time your mom comes by. I’ll watch horror movies when I’m with you, but only as long as you hold me close. I don’t litter. I love when you pull me down to sit on your lap. I’ll love it when you lay your head on my chest in bed. I can be ready (shower and all) in half an hour. I’ll look cute as hell in your shirt in the morning. I can balance a checkbook. I can never turn down a challenge. I’ll fit perfectly in your arms. I’ll understand if you get jealous - and do my best to show you that you have no reason. Hand-written love notes will get you laid every time. I can totally keep a secret. I’m pretty damn funny and will do anything to make you laugh. You will always look hot to me in the morning. I think it’s cute when you eat off my plate. When you’re sleeping, I’ll try to stay quiet. I’ll call when I say I will. Treat me like a woman and I’ll treat you like a man. To clarify: I’m not looking for a savior, a fix-up project, or anything of that sort. I’m looking for a man who quite simply adds something extraordinary and special to my life. And I to him. A fair exchange, an amazing mind, body and soul connection and a place to build something magnificent." Unknown

This quote reminds me of the kind of love I wish upon my recently engaged vulture, Lisa.

To my beloved Lil Lisa who's about the embark on the Marriage Journey (we're so old, geez):

It seems like only yesterday we would bike ride to the pipes and jump into that murky, creepy water just because we wanted to impress "high schoolers". What were we thinking and what kinda rabies did we catch? And, also, this is weird, but remember when we would go into random AOL chat rooms and ask A/S/L and we'd in turn respond with 72/M/Milwaukee? hmmmm. I guess we've always been strange, but hey, at least we made good rice crispy treats for all the guests I'd invite to our fake house parties. Whoops.

Although we were EXTREMELY popular in Middle School, we both kinda branched out into two of the nerdier ones in SBF. Not sure what woulda happened if I didnt have someone to say "no im scared" with whenever plans to skip school arise (Blanca woulda killed me) or anything else we would get scared about which seems like alot now that I look back on it.

Then came the college years..where I would visit your nerdy "on campus"dorm room and steal Goldfish and Cereal bars right before class and you never once hesitated to give me your last diet coke (Im pretty sure I blame you for my Freshman Fifteen.) That, followed with our dorm room dance parties in south gate and long walks to Late Night Library are what really remind me that I lived the typical college life, something I probably wouldnt have done on my own. You were always right there next to me to go on adventures, nervously walk into random akward parties, and then randomly decide to join a sorority for one year and not take advantage of free lunch cause we are, and always will be, two of the akwardest people on earth.

All these memories and many more are the reason Im very glad I stalked to find out who the popular girl was in 7th grade and then made a point to be best friends with. You have always been my right hand woman, one of the people I ask the randomest questions to and can tell the randomest comments too because for some odd reason you know exactly what Im talking about and you seem to already have heard the gossip im about to tell you. We are always in the 'know' and definitely two psychotic ass bitches (pardon my french). If hope Sean brings you as much happiness, joy, and laughter as youve brought me and that you two travel the world together and ALWAYS know where you are and where you are going ( for Gods Sake, give this guy a Map Room).

I love you to the moon and back and can't wait to see my lil girl walk down the aisle :)

Sean, get ready for the Spice Girls performance of a lifetime.

Cheers!

Oh, and one final thought : Even though I didnt think I was going to "bake it" on that historic drive from pike to Uclub, Im so damn glad I did. Thanks for saving our lives. You mah girl.

Damn you, flimsy lil papers.

I was grounded this weekend.

I wish I was kidding but I'm not. Let me explain further....

I have a, what should I say....issue with parking tickets. They're so flimsy and easily disposable that it doesn't really record in my brain that parking ticket = important. Therefore, I seem to have created a collection of these flimsy lil papers with an orange stripe and some small writing. This collection started on October 9th (according to miamidade-clerk.com) and ended last Friday, February 26, 2010, otherwise known as Dooms Day.

So as usual, Friday morning, running late, I work in the Gables. I have a parking decal to park in the garage that's two blocks down the street but it just seems so far sometimes when I'm running late. So what does genius do? She parks right in front of the office, in a meter. My reasoning: I'm going to park in this meter, put enough coins for about 20 minutes, show my face, and when everyone is busy, I will casually walk out and move my car to the garage. What ends up happening? I get caught up in some 'work issue' (how dare they?) and get to my car a minute too late.

These lil papers they put on my windshield haven't ever seemed harmful. $18.00? Fine, that's like parking valet. No biggie. Sure, no biggie if I actually payed them ON TIME but since I don't, $45.00 does seem like a bigger deal so naturally I put it off even more, never suspecting what would end up happening.

Lo and behold, this past Friday, I walk out to do my 'sneak attack' and I see a suspicious white car parked illegally behind mine in a blocking manner. I freak out so I casually walk over and pretend I need to get something out of my car, all the while looking at him with a face of "OKAY, DO IT ALREADY, ENOUGH WITH THE TORTURE" but he does nothing. So then I walk back in and 5 minutes walk back outside, hes still there, this time I proceed to get in my car when......."WOOP WOOP."

He signals me over to him and all I say is "ugh but I was going to pay them today!". He does a nervous laugh and says its too late, that Ive known about this for awhile and that the tow truck is on his way. I give my best pout but nothing. Then a cop comes (on bicycle, so intimidating) and sees my pout and tells him to let me go pay them quickly before the tow truck comes but Mr. Righteousness says I wont have enough time and that the tow truck is literally 5 minutes away.

This event triggers me to call my parents. Its my natural reaction, I'm a child. You have never heard a worse lecture in your life until you hear Blanca Cunningham just completely rip on you. My lip begins to quiver and I go in the bathroom and let out a good cry.

This issue is the epitome of my irresponsibility, I wish it was the first time Ive had an issue with parking tickets but its NOT! Why don't I just learn?!?! My dad says "you need to get your head out of the clouds and realize your not Britney Spears with a million dollars dedicated to solving ticket problems "(ummm thank God im not Britney, but i keep that comment to myself to smoothe over the issue).

So, this weekend was dedicated to responsibility (and getting back on Blanca's good side). I woke up at 8am Saturday morning and took my car in for service, changed my address on my license, took my sister to parrot jungle, thoroughly cleaned out my car and room, resolved a Sunpass issue I had, and basically just kissed ass. This morning, I got to work on time and parked in the garage. Two Gold stars for me!

Moral of the story: Grow up, Nicole.

On a lighter note, if the Bachelor picks Vienna tonight, I give up on mankind.