a word on first dates.

Vince Vaughn couldn't have said it better himself in that infamous opening scene of wedding crashers,

"I apologize to you if I don't seem real eager to jump into a forced awkward intimate situation that people like to call dating. I don't like the feeling. You're sitting there, you're wondering do I have food on my face, am I eating, am I talking too much, are they talking enough, am I interested I'm not really interested, should I play like I'm interested but I'm not that interested but I think she might be interested but do I want to be interested but now she's not interested?"

Exactly. I feel the same way. In fact, earlier I was speaking with one of my guy friends about the whole dating scene and as we were exchanging tidbits of information and advice, i realized that every question he asked, i probably gave the opposite response of what your 'standard girl' would say:

"Do girls like when guys leave voicemail?"

"Ofcourse, yes, that way i can hear exactly what they want and coach myself into calling them back without having to directly answer and be thrown into the lions den or maybe i can even just text back"

"Should I pick her up or meet there?"

"No way, id never let anyone pick me up. the awkward car ride, what if u you want to leave but you cant because you came in his car? id rather meet at the place"

"should i take her to lunch or dinner"

"Neither. Group dates or movies only."

I mean, granted I'm a little extreme but who enjoys these situations?! Even if I'm really into you, id rather swim in the Gulf than go to lunch or dinner. Anything face to face is absolutely terrifying to me because im caught in a middle schooler's mentality apparently. Why cant we all just have big group dates? I genuinely don't mind if you say, "Meet me at this place I'm going with a bunch of friends." In fact, i think that's ideal. No pressure, you have a network of support from the friends, you can leave whenever you want, gallons of people around you so enough distraction in case your not into the conversation. Right? Right.

About 3 weeks ago I did the ultimate 'forward' move (this guy doesn't have facebook nor does he know i write a blog and unless he googles me, i think im safe writing this story). I went to Houstons with some co-workers and after a good 30 minutes of giving the 'i like you but no way in hell will i go up to you' look, i had my friends walk up to him and give him my business card as soon as I left. Yep. I did that. It was my first 'approach' and i was nervous for days. Well, Mr. Cool Guy took a good lengthy time to get back to me but when he did, he pulled the 'meet me here' which I thought was pompous and arrogant even though secretly, that's my cup of tea. Now, all of a sudden, Mr. Cool Guy has invited me to lunch tomorrow and its taking every bone in my body to say yes.

I can already feel the physical pains of nerves and anxiety. Im dreading my morning which will be totally ruined having to deal with the stress of lunch and depending on the how the lunch goes, my afternoon will be spent dealing with post-frst date adrenaline. Now I'm contemplating where to go, in a perfect world wed go to Houstons where you can sit at the bar and its not face-to-face. But doubt i can get away with that. See?!? See how uncomfortable this all is?!

I think when im older ill be more normal but for now, no dates, thanks. Ive got enough awkwardness to deal with during client meetings, networking events, public speeches, etc. Every guy ive ever dated can be a first witness account to just how odd i am during our first date, how much my hands shake, how much i look around while talking, and all the other weird quirks i do.

Im tired of having to say "Hey! Nice to see you again, wow i just drank a double-shot espresso so my hands are super shakey!" ..............even though ive never tried a double-shot espresso in my life :/

Q&A with Monica Minagorri

weirdest thing about yourself? wow there are so many, just one.. k I talk to myself a lot and than when i realize someone saw me I proceed to pretend to be on blue tooth, except i dont have blue tooth.

seriously, whos your favorite sister, michu or mary? her initials are MM thats all you get

one thing in your life you cant live without? the ocean... it's my happy place

the person whos had the biggest impact on yourself aside from family and why? Alicia, she has taken care of me since I was born. She is like a mother to me and has shown me unconditional love and patience.

your biggest ambition? Today it's to expand Mina and hopefully have a few stores around Miami in the next 2 years. Tomorrow who knows.

do you have a sense of time? because i dont think you do. Nicole I am the one answering the questions here.... ha

favorite late night fast food? Taco Bell... DUH

strangest date youve ever been on? This dude once tried to impress me with his black card and tried to belittle the waitress by snapping his fingers to call her, yeah i excused myself to go to the bathroom and never came back.

what do you think is the most important thing to maintain a 'healthy' relationship? COMMUNICATION talk to each other people!

are you a psycho ex girlfriend? HA i love that question... no I am not, I have a few ex's and for the most part we still maintain a healthy friendship.

you see someone walking down the street that you dont want to say hi to, what do you do?Probably the bluetooth thing again, I should just buy one, but ewww hate the cockroach looking thing in your ear.

how many facebook friends do you really not know? I am guessing i have like 1,500ish and seriously probably know about 400 of them and talk to 10 on a weekly basis.

ideal guy in 5 words or less: Meet my boyfriend

if a guy wants to scare you away on first date, he should: wear jeans tighter than mine

if you could live in one place for the rest of your life besides Miami where would it be? LA or Madrid

relationship status? Taken

advice you would give your daughter once she was 18?DO NOT DRINK AND DRIVE always call me don't care what time it is I will pick you up. My dad said that to me and it worked.

your favorite thing about yourself, personality wise: I work better under pressure.

least favorite thing about yourself? I over think things

where do you see yourself in 5 years Successful, in love and healthy (just have to put that out in the world)

Okay, enough about you, lets talk about me.

how did we meet? We met through Chantel aka Flory Panty... you were a Westminster girl!

first impression? Wow who is that exotica

current impression? crazy, funny, spontaneous and still exotic

weirdest thing ive ever said/done? randomly walked out of your building because you thought it was on fire...but i could go on and on forever

why do we have so many frenemies? In my head everyone loves us

where do you see me in 10 years? Successful you are one of the most ambitious little beauties i know

your favorite thing about me? How you see every side of every situation, always keeping and open mind. I also love how you have never troubled yourself with what other people think, its admirable.

your least favorite thing about me? Sometimes I think you are to smart for your own good. You want everything and you are trying to grab it all at the same time. Slow down!

best memory together? Probably every WBT! God i hope that tradition last forever.

if you were writing a singles ad for me, what would it say? must be funny. cute doesnt hurt either.

The Male Perspective: Random Questions with Danny Cardenas

I decided to switch it up and interview/survey someone else.

I chose Danny Cardenas, one of my favoritest/bestest/coolest friends. I'd like to give everyone a perspective into what the 'male mind' thinks and ponders about life, family, sports, and....women.

_____________________________________________

1.What are you most proud of? My Family

2.What is your topmost ambition in life?I’ve bounced around this idea a lot lately but I think I figured it out. I want to find what I love to do most and become a millionaire doing it.

3. Someone gives you $1million dollars right now, first thing you buy? this $37,000 Audemars Piguet watch then I’d buy some real estate.

4.If you could change anything about yourself what would it be? Nothing, Im perfect. Fine, Im not. I would change my eyes. I can’t see for shit

5.What do you find most attractive about the opposite sex? Well, this is an unfair question. If I answer this question with a part of the female body, I’m “shallow”. If I answer with some personality trait I’m some kind of hopeless romantic. So I’ll just give you one of each: Tits and Ass ;)

6.The best place to pick up chicks- Lately, the Florida Room. I’m batting 1.000 there.

7.If a girl wants to scare you away on the first date she should…: Very simple, have bad feet or chipped nail polish, I can’t stand that.

8. Whats something people would never guess about you? I’m married.

9.What is your favorite time of day and why? Gym/Sports time. Doesn’t matter what time of day it is.

10.Top 3 things you look for in a girl- How about I give you four? Smart, funny, Hott and Feet, yes I said it. Feet. You see, naturally, I’ll wake up every day and be attracted to either legs, lips or their butt etc . But feet…. I can’t even go out on a date with you if I don’t like your feet. IM convinced when I “re-“ marry it will be with the first woman I meet with perfect feet.

11.If you could only eat one thing for the rest of your life what would it be?Pizza

12.The best place in the world is?Miami, hands down. All other places, as intriguing and as beautiful as they may be, lose their majesty within 10 days of me being there.

13.What is the last thing you ate?Blue Bell Ice Cream- Vanilla/Chocolate Dutch, Cookies and Cream and Strawberry. No Joke.

14.What is the most annoying trait about the opposite sex?well, there is like a fajillion “most” annoying traits of the opposite sex but for this survey let’s just say the constant desire to naggggg. Nag nag nag. Something is always wrong. Why!!!!?

15.What are you most scared of? Failure

16. Your ideal date consists of...?- 1st date- dinner then drinks(trying to get lucky) subsequent dates- dinner and a movie

17. If you could have any pet what would it be and why: A dog duh. Man’s best friend.

18. If you could give one bit of advice to women everywhere what would it be: Just let it go…

19. your all time favorite movie: The expendables. Ok, I know it’s not even out yet but with a cast that consists of every action film actor I’ve ever known and loved it just has to be by default.

20. where do you see yourself in 15 years? honestly, I don’t know where I see myself next year let alone 15 yrs from now. I can’t see that far ahead. Maybe its my ADD.

21.if you could have any job what would it be: Action Film Star

22. if you could change your name what would it be: I like my brother’s name, Derek. Bold, strong, intimidating and unique enough to stand out.

23. the sweetest thing youve ever done for a girl: I once asked a girl to marry me.

24. the sweetest thing a girls ever done for you: she said 'yes' when i asked her to marry me.

25. your stranded on a desert island with only 3 things what are they? I have fantastic survival skills and a great sense of direction. So just give me 3 different women and ill figure out the rest.

26. boxers or briefs? My boys need to be held tight and securely, briefs 1000%.

27. rainy days in bed or sunny days on the boat? both have pros and cons but you can’t show off your lats and traps in bed, so let’s go sunny boat days.

28. superman or spider man and why: superman. It’s gross to have weird shit come out of your forearm and let’s face it flying and being able to beat the crap out of anyone has to be the shit.

29. if you could have any super power what would it be: invisibility ;) buahaha

30. something you wish more women understood: the concept of football Sundays and a man’s need to do well in fantasy football.

31. something you wish you could figure out about women: What’s realllllly more important to them: Money or everything else? Little scoundrels....

32. the best piece of advice youd give a guy that had no game: Pick a new hobby! Nah jk. It’s pretty funny you ask me this. I’ve actually begun composing a handbook for guys just like this. I’ve compiled some words of wisdom from fellow friends who I consider to have “game” and obviously a lot of my own work is in there too. For this Guy I’d tell him “confidence man, confidence “ Women pick up on that like it’s the hottest sex pheromone your body can excrete.

33. what do you think is most charming about yourself I think my picture is posted up there right? hahaah Alright I’m kidding again. - Fine, fine I don’t know! who asksss this to someone? You tell me, Nicole!

(meh....you're kinda dorky..that's pretty charming i guess)

34. if you had an ad on dating website and could only write 10 words about yourself what would it be: “…….enough about me would you like to grab dinner & drinks?”

35. do you want to have children? and if so how many: yes, 2 or 4 but has to be even number. Someone is always left out when it’s an odd number and that isn’t cool.

36. if you could go back in time and change everything would you: not everything but I definitely would have made some changes.

37. the most important lesson youve learned in life: Gambling is the dumbest f***** thing a person can do. God damn what a waste, im so stupid and retarded. (you can tell I still haven’t gotten over vegas from last month)

38. first piece of dating advice youll give your children: depends, son or daughter? Son- wear a condom. Daughter- (in a real nice soft loving voice) “sweetheart dating is a word that only exists in movies. YOU just hang out with your girlfriends and be home by midnight on the weekends, ok?”

39. would you rather be rich or famous: hard to be one without the other, no? but Rich would be my answer.

40. What things do girls do that they think they are cool but really they look stupid? I may take some heat on this depending on who reads it.. But girls that cheer really loudly for sports or act like they really know what’s going on (even if they REALLY do know) I just think look stupid. Don’t get me wrong Its great that a girl enjoys going to a game or asks about what’s going on but if your cheering louder than me or your closer to the tv than me when the fins or heat announce their 1st round draft pic, your just like me, a barbarian and “im not bout”

41. Best way for a girl to approach a guy or grab his attention? 41Just make eye contact and smile, we’ll take care of the rest. Unless it’s the guy from question # 32 , then you just may have to shake the shit out of him to get his attention.

42.Favorite Outfit a girl could wear? I need to see legs. Show me a low-cut short dress with serious heals.

43. What constitutes a slut? Ok ill condense my essay long answer into a few words.. A girl who consistently and actively seeks men for the same reasons we seek them.

( or she could dress like the girl you desribe in #42 ;)

44. Best advice your mom gave you about women? Im stumped. I don’t remember. She just wanted to make sure I dated a girl with good values and from a good family.

45. And last but certainly not least, what is your favorite thing about Nicole Katrina ;)? Nicole is a very interesting individual and if you haven’t had the chance to meet her I suggest you do. She will and can always entertain you. example, she just texted me “chicken quesadilla wrap or chicken cesar” I don’t know nic whatever the hec you feel like eating. You see, constant entertainment. She’s a pretty girl , a smart girl and a very witty one who will eat taco bell with you at 4am. But my fav thing so far is that she’s been a great friend to me during what has been a difficult 10 months. Thanks Nic!

(awww...insert ((hug)) emoticon :)

because its monday

[ONE] Who was your last text from? you dont want to know.

[TWO] Where was your default pic taken? mokai, 'clubbing' because chantel and i 'love the club'

[THREE] Your relationship status? free

[FOUR] Have you ever lost a close friend? yes, superman <3 only the good die young.

[FIVE] What is your current mood? wonderous

[SIX] What's your brother(s)/sister(s) names? timmy trista andi meggy

[SEVEN] Do you have a job? Yessir. Director of Client Relations. d-d-d-diva

[EIGHT]Where do you wish you were right now? here. i love my office. but as long as i can take blogging breaks.

[NINE] What are you afraid of? crocodiles..they are so rampant

[TEN] Ever had a near death experience? i have the reflexes of a cat. meow.

[ELEVEN] Something you do a lot? say 'i just cant bother'

[TWELVE] Angry at anyone? nope

[THIRTEEN] What's stopping you from going for the person you like/love? nothing at all

[FOURTEEN] When was the last time you cried? when my car got towed, yet again

[FIFTEEN] Is there anyone you would do anything for? la familia y las vultures and a few select others. VERY select.

[SIXTEEN] What do you think about when you are falling asleep? global domination

[SEVENTEEN] Who was the last person you talked to on the phone? julio from maintenance...conyo carajo fix the air!!

[EIGHTEEN] What is your favorite song? ive narrowed it down to rhcp- gong li. yup.

[NINETEEN] What are you doing right now? acting 'super busy' duh.

[TWENTY] Who do you trust right now? refer to 'who would you do anything for?'

[TWENTY-ONE] Where did you get the shirt you are wearing? in the republic of bananas

[TWENTY-TWO] Have you kissed someone in the past week? a lady never kisses and tells. but no i have not.

[TWENTY-THREE] Who is your friend that lives closest to you? cristy

[TWENTY-FOUR] Describe your life in one word: Brilliant

[TWENTY-FIVE] Who are you thinking of right now? im actually thinking about this potential client im having an 'awkward meeting' with later today. not that this is going to be particularly awkward, just that i find any meeting with a stranger awkward because i myself am awkward.

[TWENTY-SIX] What should you be doing right now? responding to a call....but i just cant bother.

[TWENTY-SEVEN] What are you listening to? fergie- big girls dont cry. (we have coast 97.3fm playing all day, that is why)

[TENTY-EIGHT] Who was the last person who gave you a hug? my noblest nobbe before she left me :(

[TWENTY-NINE] Who was the last person who yelled at you? the only person that ever yells at me is blanca and ive been an angel lately 0:)

[THIRTY] Do you act differently around the person you like? Nope, same ol' dork

[THIRTY-ONE] What is your natural hair color? 'my hair is chestnut brown'

[THIRTY-TWO] Who was the last person to make you laugh? alex from the office

[THIRTY-THREE] Who was the last person to make you sad? this sad man i walked by that was sitting at the bus stop ..i even said to my coworker 'that made me sad'

[THIRTY-FOUR] What do you hear? voices

[THIRTY-FIVE] Is your hair curly or straight? straight as hay

[THIRTY-SIX] Has anyone ever called you "scrumptious" before? does 'vuluptuous' count?

[THIRTY-SEVEN] Do you have a best friend? several

[THIRTY-EIGHT] Held hands with the opposite sex in the past 3 days? no, i dont hold hands in general

[THIRTY-NINE] Do you use smiley faces on the computer? i can have soulful, hour-long conversations solely using emoticons

[FORTY] Have you ever changed clothes in a vehicle? yes into workout clothes frequently

[FORTY-ONE] Are you happy with life right now? yep, things are pretty fun lately

[FORTY-TWO] Are you currently jealous? yes, im burning with jealously that penelope cruz married my love javier bardem.

[FORTY-THREE] What jewelry are you currently wearing? my watch and my blinger

[FORTY-FOUR] What were you doing Friday night? eating hummus then 'clubbing'

[FORTY-FIVE] Have you ever had your heart broken? mehh

[FORTY-SIX] Have you ever broken someone's heart? mehh

[FORTY-SEVEN] Is there anybody you're really disappointed in right now? nope. pleasantly pleased with everyone

[FORTY-EIGHT] What was the last reason you went to the doctor for? for my right knee because im an old hag

[FORTY-NINE] How late did you stay up last night and why? 1ish and because i was tired duh

[FIFTY] What did you want to be when you were little? An archaeologist...still do.