bizarre ramblings about far off places.

stop right there.......before anything else.....pump up the volume. this is neither a request nor a command, this is a sincere plea.

Its as if I watching the world's most epic sunset about to completely set and i didn't nudge the person sleeping next to me to wake up and get a good look at it. Things like this were meant to be shared... (also the feeling i have about every quote/poem/picture i stumble upon)

In fact, I am only blogging because i want others to hear this song.

I don't know the term stronger and more potent than utter obsession, but that's exactly what i have for this.

it makes me wander off into some form of deja vu-ish nostalgia about no one in particular. Kinda like when you walk by a scent but you cant pinpoint what memory you associate it with.. a memory youd like to trace back even though in the back of your mind you know it might of never even existed. but wish it did.

But maybe that's something unique to wanderlust fools like me....i wish for moments in terms of poems, song lyrics, and movies. If I was a director, everything in my life would be perfectly crafted to match a song. Which confirms what ive always been told, im in love with the thought of something as opposed to the actual something.

Regardless, in this movie that is my life, this is the song in the soundtrack that plays when i meet the love(s) of my life.The only kinda songs that I can associate to past soundtracks have been by pitbull or neyo.

Big Jet Plane plays during the montage of "us" frolicking down windsome paths, taking black and white photographs, and looking up in the sky for UFOS.

Okay enough with this mystic romanticism.

Ive thrice attempted to blog of my two week bi-coastal visits but words on a page would not be suffice and cannot do it justice..therefore I cant even bother.

Whenever I feel like I cant explain something, I just give up and dont even attempt. I recently read that "People who are good with words are forever searching for the right way to express themselves, and that’s why they have no clarity "- Laura Marling

When i feel like i cant express or describe something, i get anxious and then retreat back into the mental labyrinth to see if I conjure the right way to say it...but in doing so I get all lost and twisted as most would do in a maze-like brain and jump onto another thought process.

This sounds like alot of emotions for a simple travel summary but im complicated like that. Id rather talk about melancholy and emotion than give a two page summary of something simple.

However, my trip was perfect.

It was a mixture of everything id like my life to be summed up in 2 weeks and 2 words. Ying and Yang. Extravagant simplicity, obscene tranquility, and LOTS OF FOOD. I wish I could balance that last part by adding excerpts of hikes, swims, or runs but there was absolutely none of that taking place. My sneakers, socks, and sports bra traveled in vain.

New York was high intensity energy, elaborate overpriced meals, wicked dancing with long-haired hippie strangers, and mental soliloquies on the sidewalks of Herald Square (my favorite spot, don't even ask me why.)

California was a stroll through memory lane with family and childhood BFFs, mountainous valleys, piers and surfers, Jeep Wranglers on Sunset Blvd with Neil Diamond blasting, and a dash of Mexican wedding crashing (mariachis included).

I loved everything about everyday because I did some true Carpe Diem'ing...something that should be done more often by my "i work all day and now im too lathargic to do anything but sloth" self.

I really think NY is the ultimate aphrodisiac for psychology enthusiasts...and for people that make up a story about every stranger they see. Its as if everyrone there (most people) are in an uphill race to this magical, breathtaking, Nowhere's land.

Now dont get the wrong impression and a negative connotation about Nowheres Land, hear me out about this imaginary thought-up land.

See, non-believers like me think that one can only be content in NY if you are very financially comfortable.

Im not going to lie or fake it; I need my car, i need my easy access to my living quarters, I need my appliances to be up-to-date......all these things in NY require a yearly salary of a Fajillion dollars.

New Yorker's are believers as well as LIVERS (lol...not the organ ...hahahaha that sounds awesome because i really wrote that enthusiastically only to realize I was capitalizing and putting emphasis on a word that really is an organ) #thingsthatexcitewriters

these NY livers walk up 5 flights of stairs, walk blocks and blocks in the rain, they struggle in the heat of the summer and wicked cold of the winter, and they know that they will be doing this forever as long as they live in NY....and they are fine with it. no, "fine" is not the word, they live for this because they understand the payoffs of doing so.

Payoffs such as laying in central park on the first day of Autumn or being serenaded by Josh Groban-esque musicians in the train stations.....Eating the finest pizza on that lil corner in SoHo where the proud restaurant owner is the one serving you.... watching parades of fabulous freaks on the sidewalks every single day.

i am a liver, but a miami liver, im too lazy to be a NY liver yet still vibrant enough to want to be a liver nonetheless.

California...i like you alot too. You are fresh, crisp, mountainous, and 'chill'...almost too chill. You are full of beautiful strangers everywhere....AND you have Laguna Beach, which is amazingly beautiful.....for 3 days. But I need a little more than that.

Miami is just so lovely and chachi and all i can think about is the fact that I'm going to be that "30 something clubber" in thatMalaysian aquatic paradise or whatever is being built in Downtown.

I am a Miami girl. I wish I was a Paris girl or NY girl or LA girl but I am a Miami girl and i might as well embrace it. I mean we did just have the next world power invest 3 billion dollars into this lil gem....so we must be doin' something right?

Anyways, I love living here yet yearning to live elsewhere. I enjoy being a burning mass of unfulfilled desires, just call me a masochist. There really is nothing like traveling to cool places but loving to come home.

To end this, I have a side story:

i am suddenly allergic to clams. How nerdy is that? clams. sounds like yams. clams made me clammy.....but when i say clammy i mean "a brutal fury of deathlike feeling was thrust upon me"

i NEVER get sick..EVER...especially when in public. I was too vain to faint. in fact I refuuuuused to faint , my brain was saying "oh dont u dare do that girl, there ARE PEOPLE WATCHING!"

I talked myself out of fainting but had i been by myself i woulda just face planted into the floor. I looked over to ashley and said, in a very matter-of-fact way, "i think im going to die" and just sat down on the table.

She was bewildered because this kind of stuff has never happened to me but i was too busy concentrating on not fainting that i wouldn't even respond to her. I just would look at her with the saddest puppy eyes and didnt even have the strength to speak. then i started sweating (i dont EVER sweat, i glisten occasionally on the rare occasion i am doing something strenuous) and thats when she freaked out.. Thankfully her boyfriend Zack's mom was there and as usually happens with mothers, she knew what was happening. She slipped me a benadryll and I was okay in 15 minutes.

Mind you, this all happened while in Fire Island...the land of no cars, hospitals, doctors, etc. Had she not randomly been there with a BENADRYLL in her POCKET (??) I woulda died.

God loves me. The End. Hold the clams, please.

Thoughts on a Plane

***Disclaimer: These thoughts were in fact had, and written, while on plane. However, 'gogoinflight' did not work for me so i couldnt post while actually on the plane. I promise Im not just trying to do one of the worlds most clever pop-culture references to 'Snakes on a Plane.'***

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58 pounds of clothes is totally appropriate for 2 weeks.

TSA screened my bag for a good five minutes. I felt strangely uncomfortable watching them stare at the Xray of my carry-on and mentally sifted through the items I had in my bag thinking maybe I brought something weird. Nope, but apparently 2 different versions of hand-held, portable clothes steamers can also resemble weaponry. Sorry I'm not sorry.

Forget pottery barn, my wedding registry is going to be with SkyMall. The 'Always Cool Pillow'? Yes please. Voice Activated R2-D2? Don’t mind if I do. Cast iron Giraffe Toilet Paper holder? Thanks, Ill take two.

I genuinely should have been a mad scientist/inventor. My ideas are always brought to life 2 years down the road. I am the inventor of the camera that comes with a built in tri-pod. Just ask my Paris Study Abroad group, Casio. I also thought up the concept of internet hubs at airports before internet was even invented. (ok now im blowing things out of proportion but still)

Oh, a cat as a “carry on”….yes, please sit next to me, I have no desire to breathe normally through my nose nor see through my swollen eyes for the next hour and 58 minutes we are in flight.

Whenever I fly anywhere, I cant help but think about trust and how ironic a concept it is. We trust random strangers to safely fly 12 ton vessels through the air, yet I don’t trust my best friend to tell me whether i'm wearing the right dress or not. And this is with everything: bridges, houses, elevators. We put so much trust in complete strangers; we trust they know what they were doing and building when we place our able bodies into these man made structures yet I can't trust you not to drop me off your shoulders when we do a chicken fight in the pool.

Whenever a plane takes off I do the sign off the cross habitually. Today I found myself subconsciously adding “if its my time, its my time” ... ummm pretty sure i dont think that but apparently ive conquered my fear of death between now and the last time I flew. I don’t even know what to account this to.

Speaking of “what to account this to,” sometimes I make up “phrases” that don’t even make sense. Like yesterday Natalie pointed out to me that its “lets play it by ear” when for the past 26 years ive been saying “lets play it by year”….i say things that I don’t even know what they mean but they just sound right to me.

Im writing this in 7pt font because I refuse for the 12 year old girl (and cat) im sitting next to to think im strange.

When confronted with the airport bookstore, I cant help but wish I was normal. How lovely to go on vacation and read a nice, whimsical or adventurously mysterious novel? Nope, not me. I try to, I really do…id love to read fiction and fantasy but I am ALWAYS inclined towards books written by psychologists. I swear that I could probably get a fake PhD from all the books ive read. My obsession is sick and maybe this is why i probably have some form of eccentric personality disorder.

Im reading “emotional intelligence 2.0” which I just purchased. Its about how to attain a higher EQ. The four concepts are partnered in Self Awareness/Self Management and Social awareness/Relationship management. From what Ive read so far, im only good with the self awareness and social awareness. aye aye aye.

I may die of starvation and Delta doesn’t even sell Pringles for $28 dollars like American Airlines does. They only give you complimentary pretzels with grand total of 45 calories. This is abuse.

On the way to the airport I was talking to my mom about my blog. I swear everyone reads my blog except for my best friends and family. Thanks for the support, guys. Even on Monday I called my mom and said “mommy, read my blog, I even mentioned you in it " –" I cant, right now, Bachelor Pad is on.” Today I made a second request and she seemed more enthused, she even offered recommendations such as “so when you travel write about yours travels like “hiiiii its me, today im here” ……watch out, Mr. Pulitzer.

How the heck do people sleep sitting up? I cant even sleep laying down, on the worlds most comfortable bed. If i could have any magic power, it would be the power to sleep anywhere.

I don't know why, but I get VERY upset when people dont follow the stupid rules of flight. ELECTRONICS OFF!!!! SEAT BACK UP!!! PUT THAT DAMN TRAY TABLE BACK UP!!!!

I am tossing the stink eye left and right at these law disobeyers. I'm such a square.

The best part of any flight is the turbulence. Its trilling to me beyond belief....as well as seeing other planes in the sky at the same time....well actually that's just awkward.